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Got an unexpected happy ending at a massage parlor

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HUELEN10

Member
This is like my biggest uncommon fear, that a massage would go wrong like this. I am sure the chances are slim and that it would be wonders for my back, but the chance that I might be sexually touched irks me so much, it's forever shyed me away from massages or waxing salons.
 

shintoki

sparkle this bitch
A few years back, a group of friends and I went to the strip club after playing poker for a few hours. It was a Saturday night and place was packed. I was tipsy already. I think I told myself I was only going to spend $150 to $200 on drinks and lapdances. There was a lot of strippers standing around-texting, smoking, talking with other strippers. I saw a hot blonde with huge boobs and asked for a lapdance. It was $25 and all she did was grind on me for like 2-3 minutes. She didn't like me suck on her tits or anything and she didn't even take off her thong. She asked me if I wanted to go to the champagne room for $250 and said we can have some real fun. I declined and gave her $30 and went back to join my friends. After a few more drinks, a hot latina girl came to our table and sat on my friends lap. She was trying to get him to pay for a private dance, but he was so wasted. I told her I wanted one and we went back to the same lapdance room. This dance was better because she let me motorboat her. lol. But, again, nothing really happened. I paid her $30 and went back to join my friends. We're getting ready to leave after another round of drinks. I decided I would get one more lap dance and probably never come to a strip club for years as I thought it was a waste of money so far. I see a very thick latina girl on stage. Her ass is so big. She goes around the stage so people nearby can throw money. I approach her and tell her I wanted a lap dance. After she gets off stage, she disappears for a few minutes. I thought she forgot about me and probably went to join another table, but she didn't and came to our table and we went straight into the back. We pick a spot in the back of the lapdance room, away from other people. When the song starts, she pulls off her g-string. Okay. Major improvement over the other 2 girls. She told me she's puerto rican and only worked at the club for 1 month. She shoves her pussy near my face, and I still don't know why I did it to this day, but I started eating her out. After a few minutes of eating her and fingering her, she said she wanted to return the favor. She takes my dick out and starts blowing me. Like holy shit. Is this really happening? Oh shit, how many guys did she do this to already?!! I didn't care. I was in the moment and this was the best lap dance ever. I cummed midway thru the second song. Afterwards we talked, she said 3 songs have passed and if I wanted another lapdance. I already cummed so I didn't see the point. I owed her $75, I gave her $100.

Luckily I didn't catch anything. I went back to that same stripclub 2 months later, but I never see her again. I still think about her to this day and wonder where she is.

Probably giving BJs for 75$
 

Rest

All these years later I still chuckle at what a fucking moron that guy is.
This is like my biggest uncommon fear, that a massage would go wrong like this. I am sure the chances are slim and that it would be wonders for my back, but the chance that I might be sexually touched irks me so much, it's forever shyed me away from massages or waxing salons.

Why waxing?
 

Rest

All these years later I still chuckle at what a fucking moron that guy is.
Upper percentile of GAF or upper percentile of world average?

If it's the former, maybe she just didn't have the upper body strength to handle it?



If you get a Brazilian a person is just touching your genitals and butthole.
That's not sexual though. What about doctors?
 
Evilore wanted to clean this place up for the ads and here we are with penthouse forums.

There are tons of threads on the front page where you can call people racist or whatever, maybe this cool fun thread for cool fun gaffers can get left alone.

That's not sexual though. What about doctors?

Well I'm sure there are people, probably a bunch on this forum, who would feel weird about anyone touching their gens even in the most professional setting.
 

IdrisOllie

Neo Member
Upper percentile of GAF or upper percentile of world average?

If it's the former, maybe she just didn't have the upper body strength to handle it?

giphy.gif
 
Why are there people who don't believe the OP it's not like prostitutes are some shit from a fantasy novel and you have to walk through a magic wardrobe and talk to a pimp lion to get a handy. The shit is in real life and it costs about sixty bucks to get a hando why is this hard to wrap your heads around.
 

m3k

Member
Do people doubt that a massage could end with a happy ending? Or just the OP recount of going high to a massage parlor late at night and then being surprised about the extra?
 

marrec

Banned
Why are there people who don't believe the OP it's not like prostitutes are some shit from a fantasy novel and you have to walk through a magic wardrobe and talk to a pimp lion to get a handy. The shit is in real life and it costs about sixty bucks to get a hando why is this hard to wrap your heads around.

I bet there's a house in Vegas where you can do this though.
 

weekev

Banned
Do people doubt that a massage could end with a happy ending? Or just the OP recount of going high to a massage parlor late at night and then being surprised about the extra?
Yeah I was thinking the latter but if people arent believing that massage parlours give happy endings, they are pretty naive and might want to go for a massage sometime to...relieve some stress.

My interpretation is OP got a bit high, thought he'd see if he could get jerked off so went to a massage parlour and got lucky. Fair play.
 
Yeah I was thinking the latter but if people arent believing that massage parlours give happy endings, they are pretty naive and might want to go for a massage sometime to...relieve some stress.

My interpretation is OP got a bit high, thought he'd see if he could get jerked off so went to a massage parlour and got lucky. Fair play.

For me, the shocking part is that he got a freebie.
 
I just realized that OP probably had poopy butt lube rubbed all over his body. You know, from the guy before him who was also vigorously buttfingered into a frothy mess? OP was head to toe covered in someone else's turd particles and probably some cum too.
 

weekev

Banned
Wtf! Clicking this thread has suddenly made Google Ads pop up with the ad "do you need a massage?" Im in UK so before anyone says, I was not Googling massage parlours in the San Diego area, I have a wife who will do that shit for free. LOL that is hilarious, and slightly scary.
 
Wtf! Clicking this thread has suddenly made Google Ads pop up with the ad "do you need a massage?" Im in UK so before anyone says, I was not Googling massage parlours in the San Diego area, I have a wife who will do that shit for free. LOL that is hilarious, and slightly scary.

I think it's cool your wife touches your dick. Nice, man!
 

Monocle

Member
My dick isn't even big, it's like 7.3 inches. There's tons of dudes out there with 8-10 monsters lol, my shit is nothing special. I just found it amusing and funny that she was so goofy about it.
Well below the GAF average, then. Sounds like you could stuff the whole thing in a thimble and barely scrape the back. Like your lovers would get more friction by sitting on a jellybean. I'm sorry for your situation, my friend. :(
 
I'm surprised that people are so suspicious of ops story. He paid for a handjob. We could probably all go get a reasonably priced handjob if we were so inclined. It's not like he said a woman touched his weiner for free.
 

Monocle

Member
I just realized that OP probably had poopy butt lube rubbed all over his body. You know, from the guy before him who was also vigorously buttfingered into a frothy mess? OP was head to toe covered in someone else's turd particles and probably some cum too.
It's called the Santorum Special.
 
I just realized that OP probably had poopy butt lube rubbed all over his body. You know, from the guy before him who was also vigorously buttfingered into a frothy mess? OP was head to toe covered in someone else's turd particles and probably some cum too.

Clearly this establishment adheres to the stricktest professional standards.
 
Just be careful you don't go in there on a day where a bust is going on. You don't want your name filed with others who sought out sexual favors from a parlor.

Anymore any sorta sexual escort get up can be tied to the police.

I guess she didn't ask if you were with law enforcement or not considering you pulled out your phone and tried reading off translations to her.

You should just watch what you're doing. Today it's an unexpected HJ and tomorrow it's being arrested at some motel off the freeway. The erotic side of it all is great, but what that is is still illegal in most parts of the country.
 

dity

Member
Why are there people who don't believe the OP it's not like prostitutes are some shit from a fantasy novel and you have to walk through a magic wardrobe and talk to a pimp lion to get a handy. The shit is in real life and it costs about sixty bucks to get a hando why is this hard to wrap your heads around.
You just gave me an idea for a brothel.
 
Wow! Reading this thread, you can pretty much take the American price and divide my 3-10 to get the local prices here. You're able to get service from $20-60 pretty easily here. That's a 30 min bj at the low end to a 2hr/2shot full service romp at the high end. Bless the grey market.
 

Nephtis

Member
I hear that in Japan there are places where the girl's sole purpose is to give you a HJ. From what I heard, they do it for 5 minutes or so, and then she leaves and a new girl comes in and continues. And this keeps happening until you finish.

I love how Japan doesn't tout it as prostitution since it's illegal -- instead, it's a "health massage".
 

Krixeus

Member
Wow! Reading this thread, you can pretty much take the American price and divide my 3-10 to get the local prices here. You're able to get service from $20-60 pretty easily here. That's a 30 min bj at the low end to a 2hr/2shot full service romp at the high end. Bless the grey market.

And where is this wonderful place? For uhh... a friend

airplane-departing.jpeg
 

Jake.

Member
i've never been able to bust from a HJ, but i wonder if a paid professional like your young lady could succeed where others have failed.
 

thenexus6

Member
A few years back, a group of friends and I went to the strip club after playing poker for a few hours. It was a Saturday night and place was packed. I was tipsy already. I think I told myself I was only going to spend $150 to $200 on drinks and lapdances. There was a lot of strippers standing around-texting, smoking, talking with other strippers. I saw a hot blonde with huge boobs and asked for a lapdance. It was $25 and all she did was grind on me for like 2-3 minutes. She didn't like me suck on her tits or anything and she didn't even take off her thong. She asked me if I wanted to go to the champagne room for $250 and said we can have some real fun. I declined and gave her $30 and went back to join my friends. After a few more drinks, a hot latina girl came to our table and sat on my friends lap. She was trying to get him to pay for a private dance, but he was so wasted. I told her I wanted one and we went back to the same lapdance room. This dance was better because she let me motorboat her. lol. But, again, nothing really happened. I paid her $30 and went back to join my friends. We're getting ready to leave after another round of drinks. I decided I would get one more lap dance and probably never come to a strip club for years as I thought it was a waste of money so far. I see a very thick latina girl on stage. Her ass is so big. She goes around the stage so people nearby can throw money. I approach her and tell her I wanted a lap dance. After she gets off stage, she disappears for a few minutes. I thought she forgot about me and probably went to join another table, but she didn't and came to our table and we went straight into the back. We pick a spot in the back of the lapdance room, away from other people. When the song starts, she pulls off her g-string. Okay. Major improvement over the other 2 girls. She told me she's puerto rican and only worked at the club for 1 month. She shoves her pussy near my face, and I still don't know why I did it to this day, but I started eating her out. After a few minutes of eating her and fingering her, she said she wanted to return the favor. She takes my dick out and starts blowing me. Like holy shit. Is this really happening? Oh shit, how many guys did she do this to already?!! I didn't care. I was in the moment and this was the best lap dance ever. I cummed midway thru the second song. Afterwards we talked, she said 3 songs have passed and if I wanted another lapdance. I already cummed so I didn't see the point. I owed her $75, I gave her $100.

Luckily I didn't catch anything. I went back to that same stripclub 2 months later, but I never see her again. I still think about her to this day and wonder where she is.

"..And thats how I met my wife."
 

Sesuadra

Unconfirmed Member
I hear that in Japan there are places where the girl's sole purpose is to give you a HJ. From what I heard, they do it for 5 minutes or so, and then she leaves and a new girl comes in and continues. And this keeps happening until you finish.

I love how Japan doesn't tout it as prostitution since it's illegal -- instead, it's a "health massage".

never went to one while living in japan and sometimes I regret it >>
 
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