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[JareBear: Remastered]

That video is classic

“Fuck off!”

“I am fucking off.”

 

[Shifty]

My god meanwhile, the date is sat in a nearby cafe slowly realising the bullet they just dodged.

Kinda reminds me of Axel's big old rant in the middle of Get In The Ring:

 

[LOLCats]

Do you like moms?

 

[Elcid]

I have genital warts.

 

[HarryKS]

Don't even need 4. Just 2: 'Calm down'.

 

[The Pleasure]

Dating sims are better.

How creepy am I?

Desperate to get laid.

I am really lonely.

Only three assault charges.

This is just like my Japanese animes!

 

[WhiskeyDiver]

Is your daughter 18?

 

[slugbahr]

Your friends are boring!

 

[triplestation]

do you like yugioh?

 

[Angry_Ostrich]

I collect anime figures

 

[slugbahr]

Your sister was ok.

 

[GermanZepp]

"I run like naruto"

 

[slugbahr]

History of similar infractions!

 

[Dunki]

I am a feminist

 

[iconmaster]

"I like being white."

 

[Jaxx_377]

Does this look infected?

You look different clothed

 

[lil puff]

These are fun. Some true ones that I have actually said:

Toiletpaper on your shoe.
I forgot my credit card.
Do you need gum?
Sorry I have IBS.
The toilet didn't work!

 

[DadEggs]

"just scratching my hemorrhoids"

 

[DadEggs]

"I really like blood"

 

[iconmaster]

These are fun. Some true ones that I have actually said:

Toiletpaper on your shoe.
I forgot my credit card.
Do you need gum?
Sorry I have IBS.
The toilet didn't work!

Did they ruin those dates?

 

[lil puff]

Did they ruin those dates?

None of them ruined the date.

However there weren't any further dates LOL

 

[Shifty]

"Hash Tag Me Too"

 

[haxan7]

I don’t eat pussy

 

[SLoWMoTIoN]

I'm actually a cannibal.

 

[Shifty]

"Like My Post Please"

 

[Scopa]

*phone rings*

That’s my parole officer.

 

[ValiantTraveler]

Alex Jones is right.

 

[slugbahr]

You eat, you pay.

 

[pimentel1]

I wrote 2028.

 

[ResilientBanana]

Can you smell that?

 

[slugbahr]

I'm not really listening.

 

[ResilientBanana]

my cro pee niss

I'm assuming that is usually is heard in slow motion.

 

[Shifty]

"Who are you again?"

 

[TheUsual]

Wanna see my beyblade?

 

[Duellist]

"Michael Jackson is innocent"

 

[Shifty]

Wanna see my beyblade?

and the follow up

"Gonna let it rip"

 

[ValiantTraveler]

and the follow up

"Gonna let it rip"

And the follow up

Can you smell that?

 

[haxan7]

Can you smell that?

And the followup:

brb, washing my ass

Spoiler

BRB IS ONE WORD SHUT UP

 

[iconmaster]

"I miss my ex"

 

[Scopa]

*checks phone*

GOG JUST RELEASED DIABLO!!!!

 

[AaronB]

Hey, I'm R Kelly.

This smell like chloroform?

I didn't bring money.

 

[Shifty]

Omae wa mou shindeiru

Spoiler

Kind of kills the atmosphere, you know?

 

[Ownage]

I lost my job.

I've got alotta debt.

My alimony is expensive.

 

[JimmyJones]

I'm a single mother.

 

[J-Roderton]

I subscribe to DSP.

 

[Vade]

Let's split the bill

 

[slugbahr]

And the followup:

brb, washing my ass

Spoiler

BRB IS ONE WORD SHUT UP

NO. It is NOT!

 

[slugbahr]

I spiked your drink.

 

[lil puff]

I lost my job.

I've got alotta debt.

My alimony is expensive.

This is awesome

 

[Duellist]

"I see dead people"